There is a commonly held belief that going to marriage counselling is almost akin to admitting defeat in a marriage. However, this couldn’t be farther from the truth – but, it is better not to fall, than to fall before you seek for help.
Marriage therapy should be a regular part of every marriage – especially now that our supposed role models (celebrities) only bring us shame.
Matrimony is something that needs to be worked on consistently in order for a union to prosper. Just as football players need to scrimmage to keep fit, married couples need to sustain their relationship by attending marriage counselling session on a regular basis.
Apart from marriage counselling, trust me, these 8 tips by Racheal Tasker can help save your marriage:
1) Listening to your Partner
A communication breakdown is often the root cause of relationship problems, so repairing it can be extremely beneficial when learning how to save a marriage. Whenever a marriage breaks down, it is often the case that both parties have issues that need to be dealt with. Sometimes, simply listening to the other person can help you understand what is wrong with the relationship, and you may even hear some recommendations on how to save a marriage from divorce. Listening to your partner also gives some understanding as to how he/she is feeling, and it may change the dynamics of the relationship once all the problems are laid bare on the table.
2) Expressing your Feelings
In addition to listening to your partner’s feelings, you also need to be able to express your own feelings, so your partner can understand your point of view. Saving your marriage depends on many different factors, but the ability to listen and then share your own feelings can help to address some of the problems. It is never an easy thing to express frustrations and difficulties with the person you love most dearly, so having a marriage counsellor, who can mediate and also participate in these exchanges, can give you the confidence to speak your mind while keeping the discourse rational. You should never disrespect or put down your partner because that will just create further animosity and resentment.
3) Be Willing to Compromise
As with any relationship, compromise plays a large role in the ultimate success or failure of the endeavour. Saving a marriage also depends on how much each party is willing to accommodate the other person. At the same time, your partner should also be open to your ideas and views. A result of two people willing to bend to the needs of the other is the discovery of a middle ground where they can both be pleased with the dynamics of the relationship. Therefore, saving your marriage from divorce is all about making sure both of you in the relationship are happy.
4) Stop Blaming the Other Person
Pointing finger at your partner will only make him/her feel further disconnected from you and he/she in shame may not want to resolve the problem. There is an old cliche which says that it takes two to tango. Hence, It is very rare for one person to be solely responsible for the problems which can arise in a relationship.
5) Spend Some Time Apart if Necessary
Depending on the current state of the relationship, it may also be a good idea to spend some time apart, so you and your partner can organize your thoughts and feelings. Most people don’t realize that taking a break in a relationship can be exactly what is needed when thinking of how to save a marriage. If the marriage has been stressful for quite some time, then spending some time away from each other can help you to re-evaluate yourselves and why you need each other.
6) Learn to Forgive and Forget
One thing that can drag a relationship into the mud is holding onto the past wrongs your partner may have committed against you. Everyone makes mistakes, but learning to forgive those wrongs will pay dividends on your odyssey of learning how to save your marriage. Apart from forgiveness, giving your partner a clean slate after a misunderstanding will also help your marriage to flourish.
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